Mindless Drivel

I think I like thinking about stupid, useless things all day so that I don't have to face real-life issues head on. I avidly read celeb gossip blogs, shop online for clothes / shoes / whatever, watch stupid reality shows on MTV about spoiled rich kids (The Hills and Newport Harbor), and as mentioned in my previous post, plan my kids' birthday parties down to the most insignificant minutiae to pass the time. Maybe it's a protection mechanism that I've honed over the years. I am, by nature, a very non-confrontational person.

Friday, my dad is meeting with his oncologist. He recently had a repeat PET scan, post-radiation / post-surgery / post-chemo. His first PET scan confirmed the findings of his colonoscopy, but that was back in March 2006. His most recent PET scan showed 3 subcm nodules in his right lung (non-FDG avid) and two 1+ cm lymph nodes (also non-FDG avid). Rich is saying that the fact that they aren't FDG avid is a good sign, but the fact that they are there at all is not good (it may be nothing, but now we need to find out).

Best case scenario - they compare his first PET scan with this most recent one and see that the nodules existed beforehand (and remain unchanged), kind of like birthmarks or inclusions in a diamond. Yay, then we can celebrate! Worst case scenario - the nodules are new, need more tests, possibly looking at another round of chemo. Not good!

I don't how much more my parents can handle. My mom will go nuts, for sure. And my dad, he may break (emotionally and physically). Thinking about the "what ifs" can make a person crazy...hence, the mindless drivel...